IMBB #19: Prelude to the Meal

Many years ago, before I knew him, Hubby attended a vegan dinner (Me: “Why?” Him: “There was a chick involved.”). The event was a graduation dinner at a noted vegan cooking school in New York City. Hubby’s very food tolerant; he will eat anything as long as it tastes good and was made with care. On a few occasions in his younger life, he was made to eat insects and small lizards, and so is cured of any particular food phobias or texture issues. He can be food snob, but he’s as partial dive bars as to fine dining. He was wholly prepared to enjoy a vegan meal; but the antagonism of the people in whose company he found himself (the lone carnivore) steadily sapped him of any joy for the food, insistent and supercilious as they were in their chosen lifestyle. Surrounded by a crowd of stereotypical hippies, PETA pushers and eco-terrorists proselytizing the benefits of veganism, Hubby was in hostile territory. It was like a scene out of Tony Bourdain’s book, “A Chef’s Tour” in which Bourdain describes an experience among vegetarians who conspiratorially discuss the inherent superiority of soybeans and discount any other food choices. Zealots – of any persuasion – are no fun. (Me: “Was she worth it?” Him: “You noticed I married you, right?”)

At the end of the meal, the sated guests all beamed at each other. The chef then came out and in the course of being questioned about his ingredients, revealed that he had used yogurt – a no no as this was a dairy. “You would think,” Hubby said, “That he had brought a calf out and was slicing it up for veal in front of them.” Several vegans shrieked in horror, got up and ran for the bathroom, intent on self-induced vomiting to purge their bodies of the filth they had so happily consumed earlier. One man, Hubby said, “was in shock, rocking back and forth, moaning, ‘Oh God! Oh God! I’ve been vegan since Vietnam!’” Hubby remembers this experience fondly.

When Sam of Becks and Post conjured up IMBB #19 , “I Can’t Believe I Ate Vegan” , I really was at a loss to know how to proceed. I’ve made plenty of vegetarian meals – but never a vegan meal. Pasta was out (eggs), most of the sauces for various dishes were out (dairy and non-vegetarian stocks), and obviously anything with meat was out. I have a passing acquaintance with tofu and I do not pretend to be friends with seiten, which I pronounced as “satan” when talking about it to Greg because really, that’s how I thought of it; so what was left? And having failed spectacularly on the one occasion that veganism had been deemed necessary, I was assailed with doubts about my abilities to pull this off. I thought maybe I’d sit this one out – but then I was in San Francisco this week and on my way to a morning meeting, I saw this sign:

In a city conducive to all lifestyles and food styles, I figured San Francisco would be the best place to hunt down some really good vegan recipes. Surely I could replicate or create a vegan menu that my carnivorous friends could enjoy? Food is communal and should be shared; just because the ingredients are different doesn’t mean it can’t still be nurturing – and good.

My cousins Wendy and Jesse met up with me for drinks at my hotel on my last night in San Francisco. Over beer (Jesse) and Belvedere and tonic (us), we outlined the menu possibilities (although Wendy’s first reaction on being told I wanted to cook a vegan meal was a revolted, “I'm sorry, for what reason?”). We decided that a really tasty meal would require the convergence of unique textures, savory sauces, and spicy notes. It seemed that an Asian inspired meal was in order – a Vietnamese menu?

The nice thing about a Vietnamese meal, Jesse pointed out, is that the Vietnamese can be happily carnivorous – but on religious occasions, they will eat vegan devotedly. “They’ve been doing this for hundreds of years so they’ve now reached a point where their vegan food can be exceptional.”

I was already on a joyful Vietnamese food high, having satisfied my craving at Le Colonial (a nice upscale take on Vietnamese if your relatives won’t cook for you or you can’t make your way down to the San Jose cash-and-carry authentic restaurants), and was in great accord with Jesse's suggestion. Wendy and I began to construct the menu. We agreed on the dessert immediately; but then she got sidetracked with using pandan as an ingredient.

Four dishes later (after we pried Wendy away from her pandan obsession), I've got a menu. And I've got the guests: J & J.

Girl J is a vegetarian. Boy J is most assuredly not. If I can get Boy J to eat and enjoy this meal, I will deem it a success...but I will have to make sure he doesn't know it's a vegan meal -- which means I will have to obfuscate menu details so Hubby doesn't figure out what I'm up to and spill the beans -- or tofu, as the case may be.

Two weeks till the event...

Comments

[Cin]

Hi Cathy,

I've just stumbled upon your post from Food Porn Watch & am loving your posts. Looking forward to your entry for IMBB!

[Cath]

Hi Cin!

Thanks for dropping by and the nice note. With any luck, the IMBB entry is not going to be the fiasco I am anticipating; I feel like I'm taking my life in my hands suckering two meat-eaters with a vegan meal. :-)