The Sweetness and the Heartbreak: An Intermezzo

I have other stories to tell about the other two in this series but that's for another day.  Consider this an interlude.

A friend brought me dulce de leche he had made.  Milk and sugar are slowly simmered until the milk evaporates to one sixth of the volume of the milk used.  Two simple two ingredients which together yield something rich, complex, and unique.

Kind of like this equation:  Boy meets Girl.  They fall in love.

What happens afterward, ah...well, I suppose that's the richness, the complexity, the uniqueness.

_______________________________________________

I imagine The Boy sitting at the window in his hotel room, arms resting lightly on his stomach, legs stretched out and propped on the ledge of the window sill; the darkness in his room bathed in the light on the other side of the glass.  I see him in this pose and in the darkness because it's probably the most accurate reflection of his mood lately.

He's heartbroken.

The Girl has called things off after two years together.  She's younger than he by several years and she's reached a cusp in her life where she wants to explore her life, beyond the confines of the relationship in which they have placed themselves.  She thinks she's too young to commit fully despite the fact that she, in her own way, loves the Boy as much as she understands that emotion now.

It's funny:  how age means different things in different times.  A hundred years ago, she would have been considered "on the shelf" and too old to be unmarried.

He calls her the love of his life.  The first time he did, I was hard pressed not to smile condescendingly.  At almost twice his age, it's hard to imagine that someone so young can be so certain, so emphatic and so immutable in his belief that this girl completes him.  But in the midst of condescension comes the memory of Christie and Mark, a couple I met years ago -- they had been married only a few years, but they had been together since kindergarten, where they'd met twenty-two years earlier.  Yes.  Kindergarten.  So time and age clearly aren't the defining factors of what makes this one The One and not One Of The Possible Ones...

The Boy tries very hard to be cynical but he's too young to achieve the nonchalance with any credibility.  It's impossible for him to contain his yearning or his hopefulness.

The Girl tries very hard to be kind but she's too young to know that breaking someone's heart is painful stuff no matter how well meaning her intentions.

_______________________________________________

Hubby and I were once talking about books and I mentioned that I had never managed to read "Catcher in the Rye."  He said, "It's too late."

Apparently there is a finite period of time in which you can read and relate to the book; and while it is possible to enjoy and appreciate the work as an adult, its power can only be felt when read as an angst-ridden teen on the cusp of adulthood, at once certain and befuddled about what happens next.

There is a kind of love that exists only in a specific period of time:  when it is infinite, expansive and intense.  It is de facto existentialism:  it is whatever it does.  I used to think it could only happen when you were very young, when all things seem possible; but as I get older, I think it exists somewhere between the tender pause of a hopeful beginning and the brutishness of disappointment so deep that no optimism can be carried forward into the next relationship.

Which is to say, beginnings are always so so lovely; and endings are so hard.

________________________________________________

I don't make dulce de leche. I get my friends to make it for me.  I have a tendency to burn my dulces.  And burnt caramel, like burnt love...is, for lack of better word, yucky.

________________________________________________

 

When last I talked to darling G., she said solemnly: "I'm ready to be happy and in love."

And D.? Oh, his love life keeps me riveted.

There's an Act III.  I've been watching theirs unfold...

 

 

Comments

[Jenn]

..Am I reading too much into this?.. :-)

[cath]

Possibly. We've all been the Boy and the Girl, haven't we?

[applemint tee]

Loved reading your post. But I feel that feelings don't have an age. Moreover, maturity is a factor that plays important role in developing a liking towards a person that completes you.

[barbara]

I have not read Catcher in the Rye Cath. My son read it at school and has an unusual hatred for the book. I think I'll read it to understand what caused this feeling in him.

[Audrey]

Dulce de Leche sounds very like Sweetened condensed milk that has been boiled for three hours in the tin. No chance of burning it but kep the water levels up.

[Jan]

It's easier than you think. Take a can of sweet condensed milk. Don't open it. Put the can in a saucepan. Fill the saucepan with water. Boil for an hour.
Let it cool.
Open the can
Voilà
Dulche de leche!
I'm not kidding.

[emiglia]

I'm addicted to your writing. Completely addicted. I wish you posted more often, but I so crave the honesty of posts like this that I realize you're probably posting as much as you can without sacrificing this. Love love love it.

[Lauren]

Hi there,I am absolutely inspired by your writing and the way that you incorporate life into your cooking!(said as un-cheesy as possible) I came across your blog when I was looking for some high-class cooking blogs and I think you fit into that category. :) I have a cooking/learning to cook blog of my own that I've started for a class of mine. I would really- and I do mean REALLY- appreciate it if you could possibly check it out and comment. I would love to get your feedback on my project and get any favorite recipes that you might have! I need people to comment on it for a grade, so it's kind of important, and who better to comment than a cooking enthusiast? :) Thank you so much!

The website to it is:
http://pitifultoprotege.blogspot.com/

Lauren

[Sherry]

I've had a cake by that name :o)